Running Lessons

So today is my lazy day, it’s nearly 2pm and I’m still sitting in my bed watching tv. Only time I’ve been up is to see my kids earlier and give my daughter pocket money with the occasional trip to the kitchen for coffee. Happy days.

Last night I went and met my friends at my exes house. My ex and friends girlfriend stayed at hers and watched tv while me and my friend went along to my middle big brothers to sit there. We had good conversation, my friend was very talkative usually he is pretty quiet. We were talking about the shooting that was a few miles from where my brother and ex partner live. Someone was abducted for 2 days and shot in the knees, they stripped him naked and put him in a white boiler suit. He was found on a grass verge beside a main road and it’s been all over the news. Stuff like that hasn’t happened for a while, not since a local gangster was killed in a shopping market car park in front  families and stuff. The police went mental with that, usually they just put some stuff in the paper and it all blows over but that was different, arrests and paper articles are still done about it. Violence is always just round the corner everywhere tho, suppose it’s the same in every country around the globe.

I still remember my own first experience with extreme violence, I had been in fights and stuff but never been in a really bad situation before.  I was around 13 I think, me and 2 older boys were standing in a lower car park hanging around, there was 2 girls there and it was around 9.30pm so the shops were all locked up above us. We were sitting at the back corner and 4 cars drove in, we didn’t pay much attention to them and thought we would have knew who it was. As the cars pulled up we noticed that they were older guys we didn’t know, all around 17-19 with each car carrying 5-6 people, all armed with sticks and knives or tooled up as we used say.

I was wearing a white denim jacket with black leather sleeves and white tattoo style artwork down each sleeve, a Johnny Richmond Destroy jacket and I loved it. We turn around and run like fuck up the side alley, the only place we can go. I’m asthmatic and smoked a lot back then so running wasn’t a thing I could do for very long. I’m last in the group and slowest too, I make it to the top of the alley and cut left across the top car park. I can hear them close but I’m too scared to look behind, there were too many and I didn’t have anything to try and defend myself with so I’m heading towards the railings to jump off down from the top car park to the lower one again and across the park. I manage to get over the railings and feel a hand grab me, he brings me back and I fall to the ground. I curl into a ball and feel the kicks, they pull me up and break my guard, they easily defeat me then the leader starts to remove my jacket so I struggle to keep it. Two options here he says, just give it up easy or it starts again. I stop trying to struggle and he gently removes the jacket with almost care to not hurt me anymore, I think he realised I was a lot younger than him and mabey had a touch of remorse for his actions.

On my way home I came across them two more times, in the end I was chased inside a house where I locked the door behind me with a woman screaming for me to get out, her husband comes running down the stairs and I head to there kitchen, lock the back door armed myself with a knife and hid behind there doors while pleading with them to phone my mum, I tell her my mums name along with phone number and address. Turns out she worked with my mum years ago and they were friends. The people outside see the person they are looking for and loose interest in me, it all goes quiet.

My mum mum and dad arrive and take me to A&E at the hospital and I am discharged after some minor treatment. I am now terrified to leave the house without a knife, I will carry one for years after this and get into trouble for it too, police don’t take kindly to knives here.

More than anything tho I felt embarrased about being robbed of my jacket. It was my first ever expensive designer clothing and I lost it in just a few months, I will never agree to anyone taking my belongings again. Now my youngest big brother was a fucking loon when it came to fighting and defending himself or his family. The most well known gangsters in Glasgow all knew who he was by the time he was around 15. Around 3 days after I was battered senseless by all those people and robbed of my own jacket my mum and dad took me for a McDonald’s and when we got home there was a white plastic bag sitting in our front garden. I had no idea what it could be. I walked up expecting rubbish thrown randomly in our garden and open the bag. Inside the bag was my jacket, not a new one but my actual jacket that was taken. That night my youngest big brother came into my room and told me he is not surprised my jacket is back and gave me a little wink, told me they people are all shitting it now and I don’t have to, I still did, I still do. Anytime a car stopped beside me it’s usually bad and it still makes my adrenalin release instantly. I have so many stories about people being terrified of upsetting my tiny big brother it’s actually funny. One time the biggest gang I’ve seen were like fuck your his wee brother, we’re all going to go that way now in case he is nearby.

It all sounds like one big violence fest but it wasn’t, there are just a lot of bullies around and they usually only understand one thing. The good times were there too, just the older you get the less there seems to be of them and it’s all replaced with daily crap like work bills and shitty small arguments that don’t amount to anything but a gradual build up to mutual hatred of life.

Then the ocassional miracle comes along and gives you a little touch, a hug that brings you back to life being good again. It’s like someone takes your life meter and recharges it for you, says your running low and you haven’t recharged yet so you go put your feet up and I’ll take just fix that for you.

I love the thought of having a special friend across the ocean. When two people build a relationship and can touch each other without having been in the same room, that is like Hollywood movie stuff right there. Two people imagining what the other looks like from a million miles away is just special in some way.

So at 3:25pm I have finished my trip down memory lane for this afternoon but look forward to returning tonight, I have so many pleasant memories I want to recall and immortalise as my friend would say.

Love from Scotland 👍✌️x

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